Why?

So, Paul says it's them not me. I was supposed to have a 2nd interview today. However, when I was conversing with the HR person last week, I never received a specific time/location. I sent an email yesterday wondering what's up. NO RESPONSE!! So, is that like "She's just not that into you"?

I have checked and rechecked the previous emails wondering if I could have misread them...NOPE!

So back to the drawing board...It's kinda weird. I have put out sooo many resumes and there aren't that many jobs out there. I am starting to get worried.

A confession.....

Soooo, Paul and I were able to go out on Sat. evening (thanks Mom!) We went to his boss's house for wine and karaoke. It was a blast and not wanting to take too much advantage of my mom, we headed home around 10:30. Since we were drinking wine and water, I went potty before I left. (yes, I said potty). In the bathroom, there was a scale....silly me!!! I STEPPED ON IT!!! Yes, I know...morbid curiosity got the best of me. Well, it was pretty much as I expected...NOT good. I even subtracted 5lbs...for summer clothes... still not good.

I MUST now exercise. I am doing better about the eating thing but now....must move the booty!!!

I am going to do it....me and Wii

Starting tomorrow...hehe

Job Hunt

Whew, I am struggling to figure out how to job hunt. It's amazing, the last time I did this. You could actually "pound the pavement" and find a job. Now, if you haven't submitted your resume online, no-go. It's not that I am totally computer illiterate or anything, but really. You think getting stuck in a customer service phone tree is tough??? Try sending your resume into the abyss. I just don't get it. It's not like I have this totally specific set of job skills what I have... it's a little above entry level. No, I am not demeaning my job or skill set. I really have been good in the past getting jobs. I was just taught to go get it. My mom taught me that there are many people applying for the same job and to make sure your name is at the top of their list. You do that by following up and "being a bug in their ear". That is much harder to do these days when it's all done by email and phone interviews. In my line of work I deal with many of the 'senior set' and most people want to know..."where'd the people go" they want to speak to a live person. I never really understood so much as I do now. Can't I just speak or meet with a person????

Feeling inadequate....so much so I can't even spell (Ok, I looked it up)

So, what did I do to deserve a psycho daughter. Really, she belongs to my sister. She was(is) the girly girl, ever popular and emotional one. My Miss Mary will cry at the drop of a hat. No kidding. It's not real it's just that in her head she has imagined some major slight and the world is now against her. She has become (or is trying to) the boss of her brothers. Being the oldest I really was the boss (in my own mind) sooo she likes to 'tattle' or at least "report" on the goings on. When she's reminded by me or her "other mother" Ulli (the great German child raiser) (babysitter seems so unencompassing of what she actually does) we have a meltdown, hence her pseudonym (Meltdown Mary) My mouth drops and I cannot believe what I am hearing as I hope the glass nearby does not shatter, Mary having a cow. With the nicest of corrections or mention of finding something else to do besides tattle, we melt. It's realllly annoying. Really! It is so much so I am contemplating having a drink at 8:30am....and not coffee (unless there's Bailey's involved) .

I have become the Queen of parentheses. I am now drinking 2, yes 2, cups of coffee in the morning....whoa....lots for me ok??? Especially since it's really coffee with my cream and sugar. (Ok, coffeemate and sugar....but I'm lactose intolerant otherwise it's 1/2 & 1/2..mmmm)
I digress.....

So, onto the other one, I feel like such a nag....to Houghton that is. Paul bought into it so he has to put up with it. I am constantly reminded that he's "only 8" (for 2 more weeks anyway) but really do I have to mention to brush your teeth over the sink or to no throw the ball against the wall in your bedroom when it's time for bed??? really?? I do remind him gently 3 or 4 times before I just go "come on dude...really" I just don't get it....I know he's at a disadvantage with that Y chromosome and all but I had hope.....
He is looking forward to the last week of day camp. There is a talent show on Thurs. He's going to sing "God Bless America" with another boy there who is also in the choir with him. I am really nervous because as much as I love his enthusiasm, he really does take after me in the singing department. I hope that this year in choir helps a little. Otherwise, not so good. I hate to say it but well, I must be a realist.

I realized that this is a rambling post. It's my blog, my birthday, so deal with it. I'll cry if I want to.

Continuing on...to feeling inadequate, and yes, I had to look it up, the spelling that is. I cannot let my reputation as a great speller be defiled by a misspelling.

Anyhoo....My ability to do laundry or complete a housecleaning task has dissipated. Not like it was really great to begin with. I have the skills and know-how but the drive, energy desire, nope, nada, zilch, zero. So much so I have taken to giving my socks (that are too small) to my son, who reminds me every morning that he has no clean socks. (never mind I just bought 3 new pkgs. ...but those are for school).....and my kids are picking out their clothes from the albeit clean but unfolded laundry basket in my room....sorry Mom.

My goal, (on my b-day nonetheless) is to get all of the laundry done. Or at least most of it....I do know that there is pizza and wine and friendship waiting for me at the end of the day....so I'll feel less of the Catholic guilt if I do laundry....even on my b-day.

Simon Saga

Well, Simon is doing well and is kicking and talking and sucking on his fist. However, he is also spitting up....a lot. He was very fussy when we switched him to formula....then we tried soy (both the other 2 were on soy) and it helped, a little, we then added cereal to his bottles....again ok but no perfect....he still didn't like it...he was fussy and spitty...then we added the baby zantac. It made a world of difference he still spit but he was not nearly as fussy. Then he started making bigger spits....kinda like the exorcist but not virus related since he wouldn't do it all the time. We went back to the pediatrician and he recommended a "barium swallow" which I could tell he really didn't think was necessary but is humoring us anyway. I just want to know what he cause is. The other 2 kids were spitty but got better with the other measures. Simon is not. So anyway the procedure is coming up on Tues. June 3oth so hopefully then we'll have some answers.

SNOT

I don't know what to do. Mary has had green nasty boogies and a cough to boot for at least 2 weeks. I know the weather is crazy and we've taken her to the doc but she just finished her 10 days of antibiotics and still...nasty. He says her lungs are clear and her cough is from the post nasal drip. She sounds so bad I know when we're out in public or around other kids and she coughs we get nasty stares. I can't help it. I try not to do much with them anyway but you can't avoid it. Simon is snotty too...his is definitely post nasal drip or such because you just want to clear your throat for him. We are using sinus washes which seem to offer a little relief. But with Houghton's asthma and the kids and their allergies (Paul too) I can't help but wonder if it's something else. We keep having this problem. I keep wondering if medicating everyone is just masking the real problem. I just don't know what that might be or where to begin. I can't help but be influenced by the horror stories of Mold, pesticides, old paint etc. I also am ready to rip up the carpet and have the ducts cleaned. It's expensive but I am getting really fed up with all the coughing and snotty noses.

Dilemma

So, while out on maternity leave I discovered that Walgreen's is going to lay off pharmacy technicians when they have some restructuring done. That means we don't know when that will be. I do know that I have to decide whether or not to choose the voluntary separation package by Monday at 5pm. I will still be able to work until the demand decreases (possibly around Aug). I unfortunately have so many what if's with this whole situation I am a wreck. I don't really want to job hunt again (I have 8 yrs w/walgreens) and yet, I don't want to compete with some subjective "assesment" process they have in place to keep your job. Yes, if you want to keep your job you have to basically go through an interview process all over again, and then possibly you could keep your job. So, I could go through all of this and still be laid off. The voluntary severance package is twice as good as the 'non-voluntary' package so now I have to gamble.

I am not a gambler. I play the nickel slots in Vegas and get a dime....I'm done...doubled my money moved on. I just don't feel comfortable doing that. So being sleep deprived and returning to work this week, I am an emotional wreck....I need a good cry.